• “I plan to live forever.  So far, so good!”  –  Steven Wright
• What do politicians and diapers have in common? They both have to be changed often and for the same reason.
• “Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip.” –  Will Rogers
• “Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body,  but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming …WOW–What a ride!”  – Hunter S. Thompson (1939-2005)
• If you sometimes feel a little useless, offended, or depressed, remember that YOU were once the fastest and most victorious little sperm out of millions.
• “It ain’t always what you do, it’s who you let see you do it.”    Etta James
• … never trust a fart, never waste a hard-on.” Jack Nicholson in Bucket List.
• Inspire to aspire before you expire.
• The most important sex organ is the BRAIN.
• Don’t take yourself seriously. No one else does.